by: Maleah Thompson, senior, William A. Hough High School
I came home in June of 2015 to my mom asking me to sit on the couch and talk. I made my way to the couch to see her in a somber stance. I asked “what’s wrong” and the words that came out of her mouth forever changed my view on the importance of life.
I had seen my friend when she helped our family move into a new house no less than ten days prior, and suddenly received the news that she transitioned into her next stage of life. I was eleven years old and wondered how I hadn’t noticed anything at the recent Thanksgiving dinner. I was in a state of shock and did not know what to do. I thought, “there must have been something I could have done”, whilst holding an immense sense of guilt. At her funeral, we stood with her family. When I heard the first line, “Come up to meet you, tell you I’m sorry” of Coldplay’s The Scientist, I could not take it anymore. I ran to the bathroom, heaving, with tears running down my face. I had not been close to her in years yet I still felt such pain and could not comprehend that she was gone.
It took me years to figure out that it indeed was grief, and although I was not in her inner circle, that grief was valid.
I have recently heard classmates criticize others for having feelings involving grief about suicides in our community, yet could not understand why there was so much strife on the topic. Although someone is not a person’s best friend, mother, or teacher, it does not take away from the loss the community has faced. Everyone grieves in their own way and no one has jurisdiction over a person’s life and what it can mean to others. I find no sense of progress in putting down others in our community for grieving over a tragedy, whether they knew the person on an intimate level or not. I have been in differing situations in levels of “closeness” to a person who passed due to suicide, and proximity does not take away from the validity or poignancy of anyone’s feelings.
Any form or amount of grief is valid. Rather than going it alone, let us acknowledge others and attempt to grow together, instead of tearing each other down.
– Maleah
